The Shipwreck.....

Got any jokes? Add your favourite ones here, for all to share :)
Post Reply
User avatar
8541Hawk
Posts: 2066
Joined: Sat Jul 21, 2012 5:21 am
Location: Bella Vista, AR

The Shipwreck.....

Post by 8541Hawk »

One day a man decided to retire...
He booked himself on a Caribbean cruise and
proceeded to have the time of his life, that is, until the ship sank.
He soon found himself on an island with no other
people, no supplies, nothing, only bananas and coconuts.
After about four months, he is lying on the beach one day when the most gorgeous woman he has ever seen rows up to the shore.
In disbelief, he asks, "Where did you come from? How did you get here?"
She replies, "I rowed over from the other side of the island where I landed when my fishing boat sank." "Amazing," he notes. "You were really lucky to have a row boat wash up with you."
"Oh, this ole thing?" explains the woman. " I made the boat out of some raw material I found on the island. The oars were whittled from gum tree branches. I wove the bottom from palm tree branches, and the sides and stern came from an Eucalyptus tree."
"But, where did you get the tools?"
"Oh, that was no problem," replied the
woman. " On the south side of the island, a very
unusual stratum of alluvial rock is exposed. I found that if I fired it to a certain temperature in a volcanic vent I found just down island, it melted into ductile iron and I used that to make tools and used the tools to make the hardware."
The guy is stunned.
"Let's row over to my place," she says "and I'll give you a tour." So, after a short time of rowing, she soon docks the boat at a small hand built wharf. As the man looks to shore, he nearly falls off the boat. Before him is a long stone walk leading to a cabin and tree house.
While the woman ties up the rowboat with an
expertly woven hemp rope, the man can only stare ahead, dumb struck. As they walk into the house, she says casually, It's not much, but I call it home.
Please sit down." "Would you like a drink?"
"No! No thank you," the man blurts out, still dazed. "I can't take another drop of coconut juice."
"Oh, it's not coconut juice," winks the woman. "I have a still. How would you like a Jack Daniels neat?" Trying to hide his continued amazement, the man accepts, and they sit down on her couch to talk. After they exchange their individual survival stories, the woman announces, "I'm going to slip into something more comfortable. Would you like to take a shower and shave? There's a razor in the bathroom cabinet upstairs."
No longer questioning anything, the man goes
upstairs into the bathroom. There, in the cabinet is a razor made from a piece of tortoise bone. Two shells honed to a hollow ground edge are fastened on to its end inside a swivel mechanism.
"This woman is amazing," he muses. "What's next?"
When he returns, she greets him wearing nothing but a bandana around her blonde locks and some small flowers on tiny vines, each strategically positioned. She smelled faintly of coconut oil. She then beckons for him to sit down next to her.
"Tell me," she begins suggestively, slithering
closer to him, "We've both been out here for many
months. You must have been lonely. When was the last time you had a really good ride?"
She stares into his eyes.
He can't believe what he's hearing.
"You mean..." he swallows excitedly as tears start to form in his eyes,
"You've built a Motorcycle?”
Loud pipes don't save lives, knowing how to ride your bike will save your life.
User avatar
Pete.L
Forum Health And Safety Officer
Posts: 7209
Joined: Fri Sep 26, 2003 5:09 pm
Location: Bristol

Re: The Shipwreck.....

Post by Pete.L »

:clap: :clap: :clap:
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
My new ride is a bit of a Howler and I love to make her Squeal
User avatar
alanfjones1411
Posts: 2789
Joined: Thu May 21, 2015 3:33 pm
Location: watford

Re: The Shipwreck.....

Post by alanfjones1411 »

:lol: :lol: :lol:
SO WHEN DOES THIS OLD ENOUGH TO KNOW BETTER KICK IN
User avatar
sirch345
Site Admin
Posts: 21672
Joined: Mon Aug 25, 2003 10:35 pm
Location: The West Country.

Re: The Shipwreck.....

Post by sirch345 »

:lol: :lol: :clap: :clap:

Chris.
Post Reply