An open letter to every person I meet who finds out I ride a

[8541Hawk]

Don't know if you guys have seen this one.......

http://rideapart.com/2012/06/an-open-le ... otorcycle/

Let me stop you right there, mmmm-kay? I can tell by that little intake of breath what’s coming next. Thank you in advance, but I already know that motorcycles are “dangerous.” After nearly twenty years of riding on the streets, I am aware; telling me now will not be a revelation. It is not an insight into my lifestyle that has remained hidden from me until this, the moment of epiphany when you shine the light of outsider wisdom on my foolhardy choices.

There are ways I can minimize the risk — by riding defensively, riding sober, knowing my own and my machine’s capabilities, etc. — but I also know there are some risks that are simply beyond my control. But you know what? There a lots of risks that are within my control. We’ve become so pathologically risk-averse that for most people it is inconceivable to assume any additional risk no matter how much joy you might get back in return.

You want to know what’s truly dangerous? Not taking any risks. Hanging out with like-minded middle-of-the-roaders. Absorbing the same brain-ossifying sh1t from media factories every day. Jogging. Putting helmets, flotation devices, and auto-deploy epi-pens on your kids every time they leave the house. Passivity. Not paying attention to where your car, or your life, or you country is going.

If you don’t get that, that’s OK. I’m not trying to convert anybody, but here are a few tips to save us both a little aggravation:

You don’t need to tell me the horror story about your uncle’s buddy who wiped out his chopper while drag racing at some hooligan rally. That just makes me wish I were talking to your uncle’s buddy instead of you. He sounds pretty cool.

Do not — do NOT — tell me about the time you almost Sausage Creatured a biker because you “couldn’t see him” or he “came out of nowhere.” I have never known a bike to come out of nowhere, but I have seen plenty of cars pull a Crazy Ivan and turn into a lane occupied by a biker or make an impromptu unsignalled left turn in front of an oncoming me. If you’re expecting me to share your outrage at the temerity of bikers to be in the lane you want, you’re more deluded than a goldfish with a passport. I can’t make you see bikes. I can’t make you hang up your phone. They won’t let me mount a .50-caliber machine gun to my bike. So really, there’s not much I can do to change the outcome of your anecdote, so save it for your coreligionists who also have stick-figure families and giant softball stickers with the name “Tailyr” or “Flynn” or “Shyly” on their rear windows.

I do wear a helmet, as a matter of fact, along with other protective gear. But, the fact that you “certainly hope” I wear a helmet is so condescending it makes me want to ride a tricycle completely naked doing doughnuts in your front yard screaming Beastie Boys lyrics at midnight. Trust me, you do not want that. My buttocks are extremely pale and unsightly, especially in moonlight.

Please, do not complain about bikes parking in car parking spaces. Where are we supposed to park? If they let us park up on the curb like in Europe, we would totally do that, and precious few parking lots have motorcycle parking areas. Most cops already have a hard-on for bikes, so parking anywhere but in a designated spot is asking to be impounded.

Yes, I know, some bikes have very loud exhaust. Maybe it’s obnoxious, but at least you knew they were there, didn’t you? They say loud pipes save lives. I don’t know if that’s true, because there hasn’t been a serious comprehensive study of motorcycle safety since 1981, the poetically named Hurt Report. And yes, I know, at one point you probably saw some kid riding his 600cc sport bike at 100mph doing a wheelie down the freeway. He’s a squid, and he’ll either grow up or just take care of himself. Some bikers do crazy things. Anti-social things. Unsanctioned things. I don’t represent him and he doesn’t represent me — that’s the great part of being a biker. I could be a Lowbrow Weirdo or Antoine Predock or Lyle Lovett or just whatever I want to be.

If you’re really so all-fire concerned about my safety, don’t preach at me. Just do me this one favor: pay attention when you’re driving. Keep your greasy fingers off your touch-screen, put down your phone, use your turn signals and lay off the booze before you get on the road with me. You take care of your part and I’ll take care of mine.

But hang-gliding, man, that sh1t is crazy.

Carter Edman is an architect, writer, and rider in Cleveland, Ohio. He teaches “Motorcycles and American Culture” and other courses at Case Western Reserve University.

[VTRDark]

I like that and there are some very good points in there.

it makes me want to ride a tricycle completely naked doing doughnuts in your front yard screaming Beastie Boys lyrics at midnight

You gotta fight... for your right... to Paaaaaarty.

(:-})

[agentpineapple]

the last bit was the best bit, you drive properly and i'll have a fighting chance, theres still far to many gadgets in modern cars, and so many of them distract the driver from what he or she should be doing. concentrating on the road, just yesterday whilst driving in town i saw this girl driving a smart car, admittedly it was at slow speed, but she was more interested in her smart phone than driving. then she clocked me looking and shot be a dirty look. i just shook my head and carried on. i'd say drivers are less aware of their surroundings than ever before.
good story hawk.....

[VTRDark]

i saw this girl driving a smart car, admittedly it was at slow speed, but she was more interested in her smart phone than driving

Only today at a set of lights I saw someone on a scooter dig out their phone and start playing with it. I could not believe what I was seeing. I juts looked and shaked my head and when the lights changed made some progress away from him.

(:-})

[lloydie]

. i'd say drivers are less aware of their surroundings than ever before.

This is why I'm thinking of giving up road riding in a few years and just do track days .

[Kev L]

I like that, good argument well presented. Can we print it off, tie it to a brick and lob it through a few windscreens?

[agentpineapple]

. i'd say drivers are less aware of their surroundings than ever before.

This is why I'm thinking of giving up road riding in a few years and just do track days .

my friend with the k8 is doing that now, his bike is set up for the track, so if he gets asked to go for a blast on the road, he has to spend time changing it to road trim again, which means 9 out of 1o times he won't bother, i'm still trying to get him to come to the dyno day....

[lloydie]

. i'd say drivers are less aware of their surroundings than ever before.

This is why I'm thinking of giving up road riding in a few years and just do track days .

my friend with the k8 is doing that now, his bike is set up for the track, so if he gets asked to go for a blast on the road, he has to spend time changing it to road trim again, which means 9 out of 1o times he won't bother, i'm still trying to get him to come to the dyno day....

I will keep the road bike ready to ride and build a track bike :-)

[VTRDark]

The day I give up biking is the day I die or have some kind of illness or injury that prevents me. Either that or I will use public transport. I don't see the point in spending money on a car just to sit in traffic jams.

(:-})

[Virt]

They won’t let me mount a .50-caliber machine gun to my bike.

Easily the best bit, would solve all our problems

I hear this quite often as well, thankfully I'm not the only person in my social group to ride a bike so most of the fools who chose car instead (ha!) have it instilled into them to keep a look out for bikers, else we'll beat the crap out of them
But that's the problem, unless you are a biker yourself or you know a biker then drivers don't tend to spare them a thought. I was on the way home today from work and someone started pulling out in front of me from a junction, I moved to the centre of the road to give myself more space and be more noticeable while starting to slow down... They see me and jerk to a stop, completely covering my lane.. What on earth did they expect to achieve? So I had to wait until they could finish their manoeuvre into the oncoming lane, which had oncoming vehicles so it took a while... The driver really just wasn't paying any attention from what I can gather, pissed me right off If you miss oncoming cars as well as bikes then I really have lost all hope for you

[Stratman]

I used to think like this, then I took the chip off my shoulder and now I feel normal again.

[BigVeeGrin]

agree with the totally unaware of surroundings in cars etc Volvo did an experiment a while ago where the vehicle driver was totally safe but right up front with all the vehicle behind them, and despite showing how well protected the driver was, psychologically people felt exposed, and so in danger. Interesting

plus, washing up the other day and staring out the window a bloke went by, prob at 30 mph, on a junction, near a school having a shave! wtf!

[VTRDark]

So if he almost hit someone that would have been a close shave.

(:-})

[Hairy biker]

I like the .50 cal idea,might be a bit much to mount on the handle bars though

[Z28DUNC]

. i'd say drivers are less aware of their surroundings than ever before.

This is why I'm thinking of giving up road riding in a few years and just do track days .

Yep been thinking this. Give it a few more years and there won't even be any 60 limits left anywhere anyway, boring!

Plus I've been caught by the plod exceeding the speed limit and I need my license to get me to work