Shame for the lad

[Mav617]

Shame for him and the family,

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-38382771

Hopefully they can all move on.

[podman]

Thats a tough call eh? Terrible situation to be in for them all.

Just goes to show you never know what life has in store for you.

[sirch345]

That definitely is a tough call, very sad for sure.
I was only just reading about this before you posted it Mav,

Chris.

[KermitLeFrog]

Tricky one that. My 84 yo mother had a stroke and went from a very clever and articulate person to someone in LaLa land. She recognised her kids from time to time but she was no longer the person who brought us up. She had also previously expressed the wish not to be kept alive if she ever ended up in the state she did end up in.

We spent 6 months visiting a shell before she died of pneumonia. Our only solace was that we were sure she was not aware she was being kept alive against her previous wishes.

My father died of a huge heart attack in the early hours after a jolly drinking session with me and my wife. I was still drunk when I got there minutes later and told him I loved him, just in case there was still some consiousness. That was the way to go.

[fabiostar]

tough call all round

[Mav617]

Tricky one that. My 84 yo mother had a stroke and went from a very clever and articulate person to someone in LaLa land. She recognised her kids from time to time but she was no longer the person who brought us up. She had also previously expressed the wish not to be kept alive if she ever ended up in the state she did end up in.

We spent 6 months visiting a shell before she died of pneumonia. Our only solace was that we were sure she was not aware she was being kept alive against her previous wishes.

My father died of a huge heart attack in the early hours after a jolly drinking session with me and my wife. I was still drunk when I got there minutes later and told him I loved him, just in case there was still some consiousness. That was the way to go.

You're right there mate.

[alanfjones1411]

All she got was 1 year.Be out in 6 months.Justice system sucks.

[VTRDark]

All she got was 1 year.Be out in 6 months.Justice system sucks.

That's disgusting.

I don't think this is a hard decision at all. It's been two years and his loved ones need to move on or that's more lives ruined. What's bad here is that the health authorities and courts are going against his and their wishes and not allowing them to move on. What's more cruel. Think of the money and resources saved too which can be put towards someone that can be made better

[Kev L]

I know when my lad collapsed the ITU doctors got the hump with the Neurology doctors because they led us to believe there was a some chance of a recovery. The two schools of thought held an enormously different definition for the word 'recovery'. The neurologists held any brain activity as a recovery whereas the ITU Docs held more of a realistic definition. At the time as a desperate parent I grasped and held onto the possibility I might take my son home with me, whatever his condition. Thankfully for him his brain stem died leaving him with no hope of recovery.
Waiting for 12 hours holding my dead sons hand whilst they tried to get a team together to harvest his organs was another thing!
As we left Chase Farm I saw the ITU doctors and thanked them for being realistic in their diagnosis and not giving us false hope.

[agentpineapple]

I know when my lad collapsed the ITU doctors got the hump with the Neurology doctors because they led us to believe there was a some chance of a recovery. The two schools of thought held an enormously different definition for the word 'recovery'. The neurologists held any brain activity as a recovery whereas the ITU Docs held more of a realistic definition. At the time as a desperate parent I grasped and held onto the possibility I might take my son home with me, whatever his condition. Thankfully for him his brain stem died leaving him with no hope of recovery.
Waiting for 12 hours holding my dead sons hand whilst they tried to get a team together to harvest his organs was another thing!
As we left Chase Farm I saw the ITU doctors and thanked them for being realistic in their diagnosis and not giving us false hope.

i can't begin to imagine what you went through Kev, you more than most can relate to the family in this story, so so sad....

[BigVeeGrin]

as Marty said, and it can only be imagined the kind of strength that you need as a family Kev at such times.

In almost similar circumstances years ago a friend of mine's brother was a Police biker and knocked off at roundabout and hit a streetlamp. He suffered severe head injuries and my friend and his brother's wife had months of not knowing what was going to happen due to the changing medical views in the same vein as Kev said and also the legal arguments that seemed to go on constantly about who had the right to determine an outcome - I remember it being a harrowing time. The brother died about 9 months after the accident and to echo VTR Dark, the car driver was fined and banned for a period, no custodial sentence, yet two small girls lost a dad. Life an be very sad and unjust at times

[bigtwinthing]

I know when my lad collapsed the ITU doctors got the hump with the Neurology doctors because they led us to believe there was a some chance of a recovery. The two schools of thought held an enormously different definition for the word 'recovery'. The neurologists held any brain activity as a recovery whereas the ITU Docs held more of a realistic definition. At the time as a desperate parent I grasped and held onto the possibility I might take my son home with me, whatever his condition. Thankfully for him his brain stem died leaving him with no hope of recovery.
Waiting for 12 hours holding my dead sons hand whilst they tried to get a team together to harvest his organs was another thing!
As we left Chase Farm I saw the ITU doctors and thanked them for being realistic in their diagnosis and not giving us false hope.

fecking Hell Kev, can't imagine how you handled that.

its easy to blame somebody i suppose, trying to sit my Dad up to drink with a Broken spine seemed ludicrous at the time. I still can't decide whether to be pissed off or relieved he passed away.

i never forget the grief. never forget the good times though either.

I will be glad to say goodbye to 2016.

[VTRDark]

There's two things that go on in situations like this. The legality of Euthanasia and the selfishness of loved ones. Euthanasia is a no go because we like to keep people alive even if they are...for want of a better word, a vegetable. How foooking cruel is that. We put animals asleep with lesser conditions. Then there are the feelings of those closest to that person. Mostly selfish because grief in itself is selfish. We only cry because we will miss them from our own lives. No thought about the person involved and what sort of a life they will have. One has to be a little cold hearted in situations like this. I say cold but actually it's putting others first before your own personal feelings. Emotion needs to leave the room before one can make a sensible and the right decision. I'm a controlled psychopath and can switch emotions on and off in a binary way so it's easy for me to say. I also see death in a positive light rather than negative which has been placed into our brainwashed brains by society and culture. Put yourself outside the box, switch off emotions and then look at the situation at hand.

[macdee]

I know when my lad collapsed the ITU doctors got the hump with the Neurology doctors because they led us to believe there was a some chance of a recovery. The two schools of thought held an enormously different definition for the word 'recovery'. The neurologists held any brain activity as a recovery whereas the ITU Docs held more of a realistic definition. At the time as a desperate parent I grasped and held onto the possibility I might take my son home with me, whatever his condition. Thankfully for him his brain stem died leaving him with no hope of recovery.
Waiting for 12 hours holding my dead sons hand whilst they tried to get a team together to harvest his organs was another thing!
As we left Chase Farm I saw the ITU doctors and thanked them for being realistic in their diagnosis and not giving us false hope.

Every parents worst nightmare Kev and probably the hardest thing to have to go through in a life time
I'm sorry for your loss but also proud that you had the strength to help others in need and whilst you where in need of help yourself
thanks for sharing this Kev

[Kev L]

I wasn't trying to draw the sympathy vote chaps, just using my experience of the different expectations of the differing doctors. Thanks for your kind words boys, it means a lot.
John died back in 2005 at 18years old. He had become a good mate and loved his bikes, the GT250 was built for him but he never got to ride it in anger.
I have two lovely daughters and two beautiful granddaughters in my life, and I love them all deeply. But I miss my boy everyday.