Terminating english

[iggy1966]

> >The New California Governor has just announced an agreement
>
> >whereby English will be the official language of the state,
> >rather than German, which was the other possibility.
> >
> >As part of the negotiations, The Terminator's Government
> >conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement
> >and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become
> >known as "Austro-English" (or, perhaps even better,
> >"Austrionics".)
> >
> >In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c".
> >Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.
> > The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of the "k". This
> > should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less
> > letter.
> >
> >There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year
> >when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with the "f".
> >This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
> >
> >In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan
> >be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated
> >changes are possible.
> >
> >Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters
> >which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also,
> >al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the
> >languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
> >
> >By the 4th yer peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as
> >replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
> >
> >During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from
> >vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a
> > reil sensibl riten styl.
> >
> >Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find
> > it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop
> >vil finali kum tru.
> >
> >If zis mad yu smil, pleas pas it on to oza pepl.