VTR1000.ORG

Bono and The Edge walk into a bar.

the barman says, "Oh no, not U2 again...."

Young girl walks into a supermarket and on her way round she sees the bloke with whom she had sex the previous evening after they had met in a pub. He is stacking washing powder boxes on shelves. "You lying sod!" she yells. "Last night you told me you were a stunt pilot!" "N...

darkember wrote:Would you think some cutouts in the chain guard may enhance the effect??

I was toying with the idea of cutting the 'VTR' logo into the sides, but was too desperate to start using the bike again.

Maybe next winter......

The Mrs has just come into the living room wearing a little pvc number, fishnets and high heels, has handed me a cold beer and told me to sit down, relax, and when she comes back she'll give me 'what she does best'.


I can't wait, I f**k*ng love Shepherd's Pie.

Travelling south on SH4 through Auks early this afternoon. Was it you???

Parsley wrote:Hi, that look the dogs mate my garage is full of model railway but my bike is in it own shed

The other half of the garage will be taken up by grandsprog's train set

ust had a huge blitz in the garage and fitted carpet.

Baby's all cosy now!

Two buddies, Tony and Steve, are getting very drunk at a bar when suddenly Steve throws up all over himself. “Oh, no. My wife will kill me!” Tony says, “Don’t worry, pal. Just tuck a twenty in your breast pocket, tell the mrs that someone threw up on you and gave you twenty dollars for the dry clean...

A Syrian refugee arrives in London as a new immigrant to the UK. He stops the first person he sees walking down the street and says, "Thank you Mr. UK for letting me in this country, giving me housing, free welfare, free medical care, and free education!" The passerby says, "You are m...

I was at the bar the other night and heard three girls with an overabundance of flesh, talking at the bar. Their accent appeared to be Scottish, so I approached and asked, "Hello, are you three lassies from Scotland?" One of them screeched, "It's WALES, you bloody idiot!" So I ap...

Went for my annual checkup today and everything seemed to
be going fine, - until he stuck his index finger up my butt ...
Do you think I should change dentists?

A wife asks her husband, "Could you please go shopping for me and buy one carton of milk and if they have avocados, get 6." A short time later the husband comes back with 6 cartons of milk. The wife asks him, "Why did you buy 6 cartons of milk?" He replied, "They had avocado...

Bumped into the inventor of OXO cubes at the bank today.

He's really quite stocky.

Came home the other night to find my wife doing something very rude with a cucumber.
"Don't do that" I said "I've got to eat that later, and now it will taste of salad"...

Went to the bar with my girlfriend last night. Locals were shouting
"paedophile" and "pervert" at me just because my girlfriend is 24 and I'm 60.
It completely spoiled our 10th anniversary.